AAAARRGH.

Dear Dell,

I told you quite clearly that if you extended my wait time for my laptop again, I would cancel my order. Well you just did and you know what, I ordered this laptop on September 4th. Getting it on November 3rd, if I even got it then? Is. Not. Acceptable. Especially considered that you took the money for it two weeks ago and I now have little to no faith in your ability to deliver me my goddamn laptop, so essentially I have paid £640 for the privilege of sending you angry emails.

I can't wait to get home so I can access Hotmail to see what pathetic excuse you've made this time, if you've even bothered seeing as how it took you three days to get around to it last time. I assure you, my reply will be much more to the point and if I don't insult your entire family tree back to the ancestral baboon you all clearly take after, well, then it'll be implied. I want my laptop, or compensation for this ridiculous farce, or I want my money back. Yesterday.

And if I have to go back to my brother to buy a laptop after I essentially told him where to stuff it because he was 'taking too long'? You'll wish your ancestral baboon had never crawled down out of his tree.

No love doesn't even begin to cover it,

Clo